Makeup trends for 2013

nude-makeup

It looks as if makeup trends for 2013 are going to be extremely minimalistic.  Color is so passé, they say, even though they want us to continue to buy the expensive cosmetics.  It should, of course, not be vibrant in color.  In fact, it should look as close to our natural colors as we can get it.  Trends dictate that we will be spending hours in front of the mirror putting on ‘nude’ makeup to try to make it look as if we have no makeup on.

matte-lipstick

Lucky for us, there is an alternative.  We can simply go without any makeup, with the exception of a loud and brassy red mouth.  No shine please.  Shine is so 2012.  There should be no sparkle for 2013.  Austerity is here to stay.  Try to look shabby.  Tousle the hair a bit, make it look as if we can’t afford styling products.  No dark eyes.  Dark eyes look too…dark.  No pink cheeks.  Pink cheeks only happen to girls who jog around the complex at 5am.  We night owls get to wear ‘skin color’ blush (whatever that means).  We should be looking much as we do, immediately upon awakening but with the added zest of slathering on an eye-popping matte red onto the lips before running out the door.

That’s it.  That’s the extent of the fashion colors for 2013.

red-lips

Here I was thinking it was going to be a bland and unglamorous year when, all of a sudden, the eyes pop up in sci-fi shades!  All of a sudden, we have an invasion of aliens!  All of a sudden, I’m looking forward to 2013 so that I can smear my eyes in strange manners and look as creepy as I wish.  All of a sudden, 2013 looks to be a crazy good year!

sci fi eyes

 

 

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Babes in Space

woman astronaut

I saw a woman driving a car down my street today.  Isn’t that awesome?

No?

Well, it sure was a big deal, eighty years ago.  And let’s be honest, eighty years wasn’t that long ago, in the grand scheme of things.  It’s barely an eye blink when you compare that to the history of the human race.  Yet, we find this picture above to be so crazy amazing—a beautiful woman, in a space suit that looks as if it was designed for a man.

It probably was.

Let’s face it, men’s outfits tend to be rather on the stiff, sterile, and uninspired side.  If it had been designed for women, we’d see some color, a softer more flattering silhouette, and maybe even a bit of accommodation for the bustier girls.  After all, not every woman has a size B chest.  Some of us are a bit chestier, and that suit does not look like it would accommodate a larger pay load in the front.  It wouldn’t accommodate me, that’s for sure.

woman astronaut pink

There we go!

I just couldn’t stand the dreary greys any longer so I colored her in various shades of pretty pink.    If we have to conquer space, we should be allowed to go out there with a little bit of style.  Nobody said we had to go out there looking ugly, and certainly, paint costs the same, whether it’s grey or pink.

Speaking of which…I wonder what color Ishtar’s suit was.  It’s hard to tell from a black and white photo, and certainly, the colors must have rubbed off a few thousand years ago, but knowing Ishtar (or Inanna, whichever you prefer to call her), I would guess that it wouldn’t be grey.  But to be honest with you, I’m not that impressed with her fashion statement.  It looks like she’s got the same kind of manly suit that the guys had to wear.  Poor Ishtar.  She probably didn’t have a whole heck lot of choices back in those days.  It’s hard to be a girl in a gaggle of guys, all doing their thing.  Had I been around in those days, I’d make sure she go out there with a little more style.

ishtar

Look at all that paraphernalia she had to tow around!  What the heck, sista?  Shoulder pads?  Boxes and equipment on your back?  According to Walter Andrae and his colleagues who found this 4,000-year-old statue of her:

On her head she wears not a milliner’s chapeau but a special helmet; protruding from it on both sides and fitted over the ears are objects that remind one of a pilot’s earphones. On her neck and upper chest the goddess wears a necklace of many small (and probably precious) stones; in her hands she holds a cylindrical object which appears too thick and heavy to be a vase for holding water. Over a blouse of see-through material, two parallel straps run across her chest, leading back to and holding in place an unusual box of rectangular shape. The box is held tight against the back of the goddess’s neck and is firmly attached to the helmet with a horizontal strap. Whatever the box held inside must have been heavy, for the contraption is further supported by two large shoulder pads. The weight of the box is increased by a hose that is connected to its base by a circular clasp. The complete package of instruments – for this is what they undoubtedly were ­ is held in place with the aid of the two sets of straps that crisscross the goddess’s back and chest. (146)

Certainly, this outfit is not as glamorous as it can be, and certainly could use a bit of feminine allure.  The woman is gorgeous, we can all see that, despite missing a big chunk of her nose, from the passage of time, but that hat…girl, that hat’s gotta go.  She looks like she’s trying to jack-hammer a manhole cover out of the ground.

Here’s another, clearer picture of her mask and eye goggles.

ishtar2

Girl, what is up with them ugly goggles?  OK, so the head wear isn’t that bad in this depiction of her gear, but you sure could use a good fashion designer, lady.  That eye-wear makes you look like an alien from outer space!

stylish space suit

Now this is what I call a stylish space suit, with plenty of room to accommodate the more well-rounded parts that come attached to women!  Of course, the minor detail of bare skin can be addressed by simply adding more material to the midriff, but the shoes are scrumptious!  Built in high heels, within a boot-shaped enclosure.  That luscious blue on teal is lavish enough for any girl’s sweet tooth, and the hair on this gal is an amazing shade of fuschia, which complements the suit color quite nicely.

Yes, I would probably enjoy designing haute couture for the more fashionably conscious women of space.  We’ve had quite a bit of a dry spell for several thousand years.  We’ve been sorta Earth-bound for awhile now.  Gotta get back into the swing of things.  Gotta get the Babes back out there!

Tai Chi Haute Couture

ladygongsun

So this is it.  I am finally going to do it.  I’d been talking about it, literally, for years but I never actually did anything about it.  I am going to enroll for the first time, in a Tai Chi class.

The thing that finally pushed me into it was not my health, which (other than a 24 hour stomach bug) has been good in general, and it was not my stress level, which as far as I could tell, is perfectly fine.  No.  What got me interested in exploring the details of Tai Chi again was this gorgeous outfit I saw on the internet at this online retailer.

Now, before you start your judgement calls on me, just think about all the various reasons why people go to learn martial arts to begin with.  Most little kids go to the dojo because their parents make them go to get out of the house.  Quite a few young people do it because they think it makes them look cool to their peers and the opposite sex.  A few people get beat up and then find a martial arts teacher to learn the skills to regain their pride.  Others see their loved ones bullied and beaten, so they learn the skills to extract revenge.  Some older wiser folks do it for health reasons, and I think that’s about as good as reasons get.  But come on.  Let’s be honest here.  Few, if any, ever do it for altruistic, philosophical reasons.

In my humble opinion, whatever your reason to start Tai Chi, the best one is the one that actually gets your butt up off the chair, out the door, and into that dojo.  For me, it is this outfit.

tai chi fashion

Wow!

It was drop-dead gorgeous and available in six stunning shades (black pearl. peacock blue, royal white, mimosa pink, dynasty red, and silver pearl).  Since this is high fashion, it is not off-the-rack but tailored to your individual measurements.  The detailing and embroidery look exquisite, and the website says that the fabric is of high quality silk.  The benefits of Tai Chi could only be enhanced if you can look this good waving your arms around!

I think I will order a set and see for myself.  I do have half a dozen sets of silk clothing that I bought the last time I visited Vietnam, but this is far more decorative than anything I have on hand.  At $100 a pop, it’s also a little bit more expensive than the usual dojo outfits, but if it is of high quality and this pretty, it is easily worth it especially when all that embroidery is taken into account.

And on a final note, the Tao never said anything about having to look ugly while you are doing Tai Chi.